Faith Unashamed (music video) -

In Honor of Martin Luther King, Jr.

Quote from Martin Luther King, Jr.:
If physical death is the price that I must pay to free my white brothers and sisters from a permanent death of the spirit, then nothing can be more redemptive.
On learning of threats on his life, June 5, 1964

More to come later.

Chuck

Regrets

My father-in-law passed away six years ago today and I miss him terribly, for he was kind, strong, gentle when necessary, but most of the time rather forceful, and a real kidder.

I miss my own parents too; they've been gone for 17 and 13 years. I have things I would have like to have shared with them but never did. I'll always regret not talkingto them about some of the issues that are extremely important to me. My friends told me that those things would kill my mother -- but she died even though she and I never talked about some essential things about my life. I can only wonder how my life might have been different if only I had tried to share my life with my parents in a meaningful way.

The journey is meant to be shared. You don't have to go it alone.

Peace,
Chuck

Loneliness

"Who am I lonely for? God? Myself? Other people?"

OK, I'm holding on tight, closing my eyes, gritting my teeth, ready to see what happens with this new revelation: I am lonely. And I am going to reflect on what I am lonely for. The above quotation comes from a book of meditations that I use daily and it jumped out at me yesterday because I had never considered that I could be lonely for myself.

MUSICAL INTERLUDE: "One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do." -- Three Dog Night

First, I can be lonely in a crowd. That's something which I believe most people can identify with. You're in a theater by yourself, but despite the large group of people sitting around you, you still feel lonely. That can happen sometimes.

I can also feel lonely in a small group of people who are my friends or colleagues; when I disagree with the rest of the group on whatever topic might be at hand, I will feel absolutely isolated. But I can still feel lonely in groups when I agree with everything everyone is saying.
However, in a small group of friends, and one on one, I rarely, if ever, feel lonely.

Next, I do feel lonely for God. Because of my training, because of wrong-headed beliefs taught to me by well-meaning people, I sometimes feel like my very existence is an abomination to God. Don't get me wrong -- I don't spend a lot of time in that space, but from time to time it bubbles up.

I am also lonely for myself. Having lived for others, having put the needs of others before my own, I have lost sight of who I am. I have let others define who I am and I have lost myself in the process. In order to be free, I must reclaim the values which are mine and proclaim them to whoever is willing to listen. Far too often I have been a chameleon, letting people think I agree with their ideas, simply by keeping silent. No more. Now is the time for me to speak what I know is true and let others love me for it, or despise me for it. There will be enough people who will love me for it to have new friends, perhaps even a new family.

Go in peace, for God is with you and God is the source of our Freedom.

Chuck

letting go

I was touched, moved and inspired by this video.

From darkness to light

Someone gave me a parallel Bible today, not two or more English translations, nor Greek/English, nor Hebrew/English, but Spanish and English. It's a great gift, even though I am extremely limited in my Spanish (or because I am). Anyway, I spent some time looking up familiar verses to see how they read in espanol and came across an interesting Spanish idiom. In the Christmas story in Luke 2:7, where it says "she gave birth to her firstborn, a son," the Spanish idiom would literally mean "she gave to light to her firstborn son." What a wonderful image, giving birth meaning giving to the light. A person comes out of the womb, where it is dark, and enters the light. Artists painting their portraits and still life pictures, authors writing their novels and their non-fiction works, pastors crafting their sermons-- are giving birth and their work is brought to light. And hopefully their work sheds light on their subjects. Bringing things to light is like giving birth. Coming out for gay men and lesbians is bringing something to light and something is born. (I hope my gay friends will agree with that.) That's what my journey to freedom is about in one sense, bringing things to light and giving birth to them within myself. Comments on this are welcome!

On the journey, not alone, but with friends who love me,
Chuck

Oliver! - Where Is Love